Wednesday, November 27, 2013

baby and syncing/grounding energies

Before Baby Faye was born, I would do regular grounding/syncing energy practices. Picture the famous tree meditation and you'll get a something of an idea of what I was doing, on some level. My practice had me a bit less focused on rooting and more focused on tapping into a universal energy current.

During some of my hardest moments with Baby Faye, I've gone back to that practice, pulling on that current, to help calm myself, relax, and let go of my frustrations. It has been invaluable for me as a new mother struggling with her feelings of post partum resentments (which I've spoken about before).

And somewhere along the way I've started noticing how the practice, when done with Baby in my arms, impacts him and how I tap into his energies.

When I use this exercise to relax, it almost always leads to him relaxing too. Yes, I know, this seems like a no brainer and something that might be just common sense because he calms down when I calm down.

But there's a catch, because when I pay attention to his energies while I'm doing it, I realize how completely synced our energies are. How, despite the cord being cut, he is so very much still attached to me. And that during this exercise, his energy pulses completely in sync with my own. That he is part of my own energy field, a small ball of additional energy, in tune with my own. He is his own, and yet, flows with me.

It's amazing and intriguing. And totally makes sense but surprising at the same time. I wonder if the same happens when he is with his father. I wonder if energy flows between his Dad and I in the same way when we are in sync. My husband is far to skeptical of my hippie dippy ways to patiently let me figure this out, so alas, I'll likely never really know!

I find myself wondering if this will always be this way, or if he will outgrow it as he learns of himself as a self/entity other than me.

I suppose that time will only tell. But in the meantime, I'm quite enjoying the side benefits of my relaxation/grounding exercise: calm, sleepy baby! Bestest baby sleep routine ever...


Monday, November 25, 2013

building a new routine post baby

Baby Faye hit the 4 month mark recently (where did the time go) and this particular milestone is important because it means that he's starting to settle into patterns. Those patterns might be in flux for a while, but things are starting to have a shape to them around here and I have a better sense of what I can expect in my day.

After 3 + months of anything goes, this is an amazing place to finally be at. Why? Because it means that slowly but surely, my life is starting to have a pattern to it. It means that I can start reintegrating or introducing practices into my daily life.

Why yes, that is my freakishly large big toe :)   Getting back to my mat = happy morning meditation

For now I'm keeping it simple. I'm working on doing a bit of yoga in the mornings. Sun Salutations to start the day, followed by a bit of time in Corpse Pose to get in touch with the energies around me. Once I get that in as a routine, I'm hoping to try some Moon Salutations to end my day. I don't know how well these will work out for me though because I've always struggled with end of the day routines.


Thursday, November 21, 2013

oil pulling adventures: day one

I've been reading about oil pulling for a while now and have been meaning to try.

While today I started. I used high grade oil, combined with lemon essential oils, as recommended by this essential oil blogger. I added 4 drops of lemon oil to 4 oz of olive oil, and then took 1 tablespoon of the mix. When it hit my mouth I wasn't too thrilled, but churning it around activated the lemony flavour.

And it lasted for about 2 minutes before it hit my gag reflex. Like, really hit my gag reflex.

Interesting to note though, when I spat out the oil, it was opaque.

What have I learned from this first attempt?

That maybe I should be using a different oil? Though I can't quite figure out how one would use coconut oil as it's solid (or at least any time I've seen it in a store, it's solid). Honestly, the thought of melting it before using it seems like a step too many. I'm all about a process being easy in order for it to be successfully integrated into my routine. But I read in her comments section that the oil melts in your mouth super fast so maybe it wouldn't be so bad?

Add more essential oil into the mix. I was being conservative with the oils because I'm just starting with ingesting essential oils and am probably being a little too cautious as I figure my way around. I might also add some of the Thieves oil that I have into the mix. I'm leery of doing it with clove oil as I've heard it be quite strong (though I plan on using on Baby Faye when he starts teething so maybe I should try it)!

Anyone out there do oil pulling? Have any tips?


Wednesday, November 20, 2013

patterns and life lessons

Do you ever catch yourself repeating the same patterns in your life?

I do.

A lot! In fact, I catch myself doing this the most in my friendships. While all my friends are different from one another, there is this weird overlapping in "types" of people that I do in my life.

National Museum, London
For example, I always have this one opinionated, hard to mix with others friend. First there was M, now there is G. I love G but she is very hard to introduce to others. A lot of people are put off by her because she can be so opinionated. And yet, she's really a wonderful person. But the combination of being opinionated and being very sensitive makes it hard to disagree with her.

I also have E who is a new type of K in my life. She is strong willed, confrontational, chatty, and fun. We have great, honest, spiritual conversations and I love what she brings into my awareness, even though sometimes she does so with a double edged sword.

And finally there is J, who is like R, who was like S. (Are you following me so far). All of whom have been some of my bestest friends. Amazing, kind, generous, soul mate type friends. While at the same time being unreliable, thoughtless, and driving me batty types of friends. You know, if they were just one or the other, you'd keep them or ditch them, but the combination of the two keeps you coming back for more. And I do. Every single time. Even after the friendship is over because it makes me sad to lose these people in my life because when they're good friends, they're amazing friends. You know? They're the kind of friends who just get you and yet, can take the most advantage of you.

more National Museum
This overlap in types, particularly the last one, has gotten me thinking a lot about what I'm supposed to be learning. Because honestly, if I keep repeating the pattern, I think there's a reason for it and there's a lesson to be had from it karmically.

What I'm trying to figure out right now, is what that lesson is meant to be. Is it:

  • Learning to set boundaries
  • Letting go and not beating a dead horse
  • Accepting others for who they are
  • Not letting others treat me poorly

I feel like the answer is somewhere in between all four answers, and yet, I'm driving myself crazy with it. If I were watching anyone else in this situation, I tell them to drop the friend because that person treats them so poorly, and yet, I recognize in my own friendship that while I am being treated poorly, there are still things I love about the friendship in question.

And therein lays the problem. In typical Faye reaction, I am loathe to let go of something that I still love even if I know that it isn't necessarily in my best interest to keep it. The fact that I keep repeating this theme in my life obviously means that it's one of those big life lessons I need to master. But damn it, I'm really struggling with it!

What patterns seem to repeat in your life and what do you suspect you're supposed to be learning from them?


Tuesday, November 19, 2013

talking it out or keeping quiet

Lately I've been thinking a lot about my patterns of behaviour. I've always thought about who I am as a person, but motherhood has shifted some of the ways that I see myself and the areas in my life that I want to focus on.

All my life I've been a staunch believer in the school of thought that the best way to deal with a problem is to hash it out with friends. I'm a talker. I will hash things out several times, with different friends, repeatedly before finding closure on an issue.

But recently I've noticed that all this talking doesn't actually ever make me feel better. Ok, sometimes it does. But most of the time, it actually makes me angrier. More worked up. Resentful. Self-righteous or indignant.

You get the picture. So when recent events conspired to bring about another scenario in Faye land that would normally have me heading to the phone to hash it out with friends, this time I opted for a different approach. When I felt my blood starting to boil, I pulled back and meditated instead. I worked on letting go, breathing, and accepting that while I didn't like it, it wasn't worth getting so worked up about.

And you know what? I felt a whole lot better, a lot faster, than I normally do in these types of situations.

Now I'm not saying that you should always stay silent or that meditation will work in all scenarios, but I am starting to see how maybe I might need to let go of old patterns of response in order to feel more contentment in my life. Hey, it's worth a shot, right?


Thursday, November 14, 2013

the ethics of spiritual goods

A recent conversation has left me wondering about the social implication of spiritual goods coming from China (or some other foreign country). What does it mean when we decorate our homes with religious icons, banners, etc., made by individuals in these countries for sub-par wages, in unethical conditions?

Image Source

I'm sure that for many individuals this isn't something they worry about or even care to worry about, but it's something I've been thinking about a lot lately. You see, I have this Buddha statue that I bought ages ago from a dollar store. Yes, a total score... $1 for a pretty golden Buddha. I was pretty stoked at the time.

These days however, I find myself always aware of the statue's origins when I look at it and it bothers me. Not that it's from a dollar store, but that it was made in unethical conditions and yet I use it as a reminder of my spiritual aspirations. Obviously my statue and my aspirations are at odds with each other!

The answer of course, is not to go out and buy more expensive goods. Let's face it, they're probably made under the same conditions.

So what do we do? I'd normally say turn to places like etsy and have a local artist make it, but these days etsy isn't a reliable source of artisan work. But even if it were, this is potentially a very expensive route. One could argue that less is more and taking the time to buy one high quality, ethical item far outweighs the need to fill a space with several items. However, not everyone is of the less is more school. I know that it's not much of a motto in my world (I keep trying but alas... I like the sparkle).

We could always take the time to make our spiritual symbols/items. But if we're not much in the way of artists, then this is more headache than it's worth!

Obviously I don't have an answer. This is something that everyone must decide for themselves. But on my end, I'm working on a less is more motto, for what it's worth, or a handmade motto, when I can, because my little Buddha statue is weighing heavily on my mind. While I won't get rid of him as that would be a different type of wasteful, I'd like to keep future purchases to more ethical modes of consumption. You know, practice what I preach and all that jazz!



Tuesday, November 12, 2013

this and that

Oh I have so many things that I want to write about these days. I'm all awash in energy and inspiration. Isn't it funny how that happens? These things are very much cyclic. There is always a time of cutting away and clearing before we harvest an abundance of ideas/inspirations.

At least, that's how I experience it. Maybe your journey looks different. I'm not sure...


My biggest challenge these days? Finding time to sit down and write about all this stuff or organize my thoughts into a cohesive form so that they can be shared. I know, life is rough over here in Faye-land.

In the meantime, let me share some of my baking endeavours:

Ginger Pumpkin Scones
They're pretty good. I think I'd play around with the spices a bit to get just the right mix for me. The icing tastes remarkably like cinnamon gum. A little uncanny but tasty nonetheless.

Oh, and I tried making granola bars. Hello. I'm never buying them again. They are so easy to make it's ridonkulous! And tasty, see:

Yummy. Recipe found here.


Monday, November 4, 2013

embracing the pumpkin craze!

I don't know if you've noticed but this year there seems to be quite the abundance of all things made with pumpkin. Honestly, aside from pumpkin pie and pumpkin oil (it's a Slovenian thing and my in-laws use it on all their salads... it's one of those love it or loathe it things... I love it), I've never really done much with pumpkin.

Also... I have never actually cooked real pumpkin. I've always bought the canned stuff.

But I'm trying to make a move towards real foods as much as possible. With that in mind, I decided to attack my pumpkins post Halloween (not the ones we carved... they weren't too healthy looking. But we had 2 extras because my in-laws bought Baby Faye a pumpkin on top of the one that we bought to carve for him. Neither got carved). Waste not, want not... those pumpkins met my butcher knife and are being sacrificed to the alter of experimentation.

If you're ever curious to try it, here's what I did:

wash the pumpkins
cut it open like you would for carving

cut it in half and start gutting it


Peel and cut into smaller pieces. DO NOT peel this with a potato peeler. I busted mine and I had a really good one :(
Put in pot, add water, boil until soft (25 to 35 min)

Smash 'em into puree to be used in recipes
I've only cooked about 1/3 of my stash right now. The rest will get done this afternoon. I plan on freezing most of it into 1 and 2 cup quantities for baking purposes later (I can only eat so much pumpkin). I found the pumpkin really soft and easy to mash. I might run it through my mini food processor to make it smoother, but then again, I might not.. we'll see)

The hardest part about doing this was cutting and peeling because the skin is tough and the pumpkins were large and unwieldy. I cut them into small sections to manage better. It took me about 30 mins (interrupted by Baby Faye) to get it done.

First thing I'm making: Ginger Pumpkin Scones. I mixed the dry ingredients last night and will add the wet stuff in this afternoon while I cook the rest of the pumpkin. I'll let you know if they're any good!