February has been an insanely busy month. Good but busy.
I'm still working my way through my word for the wheel, thinking about how I'm going to manifest heart in my daily life in relation to this turn of the wheel.
Candlemas is for me a time of beginnings and setting intentions that reflect my values. I've been stewing on what that means for me as a practice this sabbat, slowly percolating on it in the background.
Mostly I want to make sure that I remember to stay open and keep room for those I love in my daily actions. I can easily start shutting down when I feel overwhelmed or stressed. I tend to let my friendships and general partnerships feel like a burden instead of a joy when I'm not careful. I need to be mindful about not doing that and not allowing things to feel complicated when they're really not.
So this month, instead of moving away, I've been trying to lean in when I start finding myself pulling back. Earlier this month that meant choosing to invite a friend and her daughter over for a sleep over instead of staying home and potty training. This week it's meant starting a texting conversation with one of my nearest and dearest friends who lives on the other side of the country. It also meant calling my Grandma and just chatting because she's great and I love her. It meant buying my students Valentines lollipops just to say thank you and telling them that I appreciate them. It meant baking chocolate cupcakes for my husband because he loves chocolate cake (I don't like chocolate cake). Or putting down my phone in the evenings to play puzzles and ball and train and drawing happy/angry/sad/confused/scared/surprised suns and stars for my son. It's meant reading Love You Forever even though it makes me cry because that's what Little Faye wants.
It's also meant reading an esoteric book that has me reacting constantly out of trust that there is a reason for the reactions and that there's something in it that while provoking to me is something that I need to work through. It's forcing me to look more closely at why I react so strongly to Judeo-Christian mythology but not other myths that sit uneasy. I'm trying to remember that my pathworking won't always be easy and that sometimes I need to trust the process by embracing what comes my way. Don't get me wrong, my inner brain rationalizes my discomfort and tries to wiggle it's way out of it but I was given this book for a reason and I need to trust the process. This is not easy for me. But often the things I struggle the most against are the things that I end up enjoying the most in the end. Hermetics in general tend to fall into this category and this book looks at a lot of Hermetic knowledge, so....
I'm also dragging my butt to the gym and working on eating better. Mind, body and soul seem to be the theme for my word this spin around the sun. I've said it before but yet again I am reminded of just how much I need physical activity to burn off energy and work out tensions in order to allow for the good stuff to come through.
I've even made more time for scrapbooking and art journaling. It's not as much as I used to do, but it's more than I've done in a long time.
This month I'm leaning in with love so that I live a life that embraces open heartedness and trust. That I give out what I want to get back and trust that it will be returned.
How is your word practice going? Are you working on a word/intention/resolution this year and how does it look in relation to your spiritual practice?